men are from mars and women are from jupiter

we live in a world where people are trying to convince you there are no distinctions between men and women. 

it’s a load of shit. 

but, these differences aren’t about your value or capability; they’re about your patterns, tendencies, and how you approach problems, 

including how you run your business.

if you point out these differences, it often comes with backlash. 

people claim you’re making generalizations or being regressive. 

but generalizations exist for a reason,

they help us understand broad trends. 

no, not everyone fits the mold, and yes, unique qualities make you, YOU. 

but recognizing patterns can help you see your blind spots and lean into your strengths.

as a business owner and investor, i’ve seen these patterns play out time and time again. 

and honestly, understanding them has helped me make smarter decisions, 

not just for myself but for the people i work with.

the patterns i’ve noticed

men and women tend to approach business differently, especially when it comes to risk taking and projections. in general:

• men: overshoot their projections, often aiming for the stars but missing the mark. they tend to underestimate downsides and overestimate what their business can achieve.

• women: are more conservative with their projections. they’re better at recognizing downside but often miss out on the full potential value of their businesses.

one of my businesses is a private lending company. 

we give loans to businesses that can’t go to banks, 

such as online businesses that lack physical collateral. 

we structure these loans with interest paid monthly and, in most cases, a small piece of equity. if all goes well, i get my interest and some money when the company exits, 

if it all goes to shit, and the business defaults, i gain a controlling stake and essentially purchased a company for pennies.

win-win.

here’s what i’ve seen in practice: male entrepreneurs often pitch with big, ambitious numbers but rarely hit those targets. 

female entrepreneurs are more realistic in their pitches and usually hit their projections, but they sometimes miss the bigger picture of what their business could achieve.

how i adjust based on these patterns

as an investor, i use these insights to structure deals. 

for male entrepreneurs, i focus on earning more through interest upfront because i know the likelihood of hitting their sky-high projections is lower. 

for female entrepreneurs, i take more equity and lower interest, knowing their conservative approach often leaves hidden value on the table.

it’s not about playing favorites; it’s about hedging against the patterns i’ve seen time and time again. 

and these trends aren’t just random, they’re rooted in biology and social conditioning.

biology and upbringing: why we act the way we do

our approach to business is shaped by both our biology and how we were raised.

• men: 

  • are wired to take risks. think back to hunter-gatherer days, picking up a spear to hunt required guts and a willingness to face danger. 

  • testosterone fuels that risk-taking behavior, and it hasn’t disappeared. 

  • even in childhood, boys are often encouraged to take risks and believe in themselves. well, at least in past generations.

• women: 

  • are better at spotting downsides. 

  • historically, women were in more vulnerable positions, requiring careful decision-making to protect themselves and their families. 

  • this caution extends to business. growing up, girls are often taught to be more reserved and to think through outcomes before acting. (again, in previous generations but things have changed). 

these instincts, combined with how society shapes us, deeply influence how we approach risk, reward, and decision-making as adults.

so which is better?

both approaches have their strengths and weaknesses. 

the key is knowing when to lean into your tendencies and when to balance them out. here’s what i’ve learned:

• for men: 

  • audacity and ego can push you to strive for more, but they can also blind you to risk when things go wrong. 

  • learn to pause and consider the downside. ask yourself: what’s the worst thing that could happen if this goes wrong? if you can live with that, go for it. if not, maybe rethink the move.
    

• for women: 

  • being conservative is a strength, and a steady pace of growth is ideal. afterall, the tortoise beat the hare. 

  • but it can also mean missing out on opportunities. 

  • sometimes, the potential upside is worth the risk. ask yourself: what’s the worst-case scenario if i’m wrong? if it’s manageable, take the leap.
    

when starting out, a bold, risk-taking approach can help you gain momentum. 

but as your business grows, a more calculated, cautious mindset becomes crucial. 

it’s about knowing when to switch gears.

the takeaway: self-awareness is the ultimate edge

at the end of the day, these are generalizations. 

not everyone fits these patterns perfectly. 

you might be a man who operates more cautiously or a woman who thrives on risk. 

and that’s okay. 

what matters most is self-awareness, understanding your own tendencies and how they shape your decisions.

are you someone who overshoots and misses the mark? or are you so cautious you’re leaving money on the table? 

recognizing these patterns in yourself can help you make better decisions, both in business and in life.

next time you’re faced with a big decision, take a step back. ask yourself: am i leaning too far into my natural tendencies? if so, what can you do to balance it out?

because at the end of the day, it’s not about being perfect. it’s about knowing yourself and using that knowledge to win the game.

till next time,
vessal

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